Step-mothers and mothers

[Jamie]

I have a step-mom who basically brought me up and a mom that left. My mom recently ***e back and wants to be a part of the wedding. They cannot be around each other, so I don't know who should do what. Who should help me get ready or light the candle? Is there any other duties that my mom can do for the wedding and still feel a part of it?

[shortstuff]

I'm in the same situtaion that you're in right now. my mom left when i was little and my dad and step-mom raised me. my real mom ***e into the picture not to long ago and want's the responsiblity of the mother of the bride.I simple told her as nicley as i could that they were allready taken care of. and that i would not feel comfortable with her participating in the wedding and asked that she not show up.

[Angeltee4u]

I know just how you feel. my Mom had 5 children and gave us all 5 up and none of us hardly have anything to do with her cause she wants everything her way. My step mom (which is really my aunt, my real mom's sister) so my step mom whome I call mom from the time I was 3 days old til this day. and my real mom and I recently had some words to each other that wasn't nice but she is the one who started the whole thing so I'm not really worried about her. so I am still wondering if I should be nice about the whole thing and still send her an invitation or not . any suggestions on how I should do this or if I should still send her an invitation after all that she has put me through all my life and everything ? Cause myself I rather her not be there cause I am afraid that she will cause some kind of a disruption or something and that would just ruien my whole day. but I don't wanna make her feel left out either. Cause she will throw that up in my face everytime she sees me. So I am kinda stuck between a rock and a hard place on this one.

[Mandisa]

There are a few things that you can do. As for lighting the candle, if you feel comfortable enough with your mom she can light the candle but your stepmom can help you get ready. (or the otherway around) Also you can have your mom help you get ready and have your stepmom light the candle and stand in the receiving line. There is one last option, and that is having your stepmom do all of the things mentioned but just give her and your real mom a coursage. It is entirely up to you. What you have your mom do will depend on how close the two of you become by the time the wedding comes. Just make sure to talk to both of your moms and remind them that it's your day and you would really like them to be on their best behaviors if by some chance they just happen to cross paths at the wedding.

Hope this helps