Another Ex Question

[Fire and Ice]

My fiance's ex girlfriend of 2 1/2 years has been trying to cause trouble within our relationship, but he still wants to invite her to our wedding. I can't understand why he wants her there because I'm not inviting any of my exes. I want to tell him that it's my wedding, and it's going to be how I want it, but I can't because it's his wedding too. It's our special day, and I want it to be as perfect as possible; and I defiantly DON'T want to feel uncomfortable. Should I tell him that its her or me? or should I just let him invite her to keep the peace?? I can't help but think that inviting her might bring closure to their relationship... kind of like a he's my husband, so keep your hands off type thing... but then again, she's crazy and she might do something to ruin it.. I really need some help with this!!!

[AngelicAlwys]

I completely understand how you feel. I would suggest finding a time why you both can sit down and talk about the situation when niether person is mad or upset and talk don't yell and try to understand why he wants his ex at the wedding and then calmly explain to him why you don't want her there and try to come up with a compromise. Marriage is about compromising and making decisions together.

[Toy]

I think that the best approach would be to discuss it. Explore the reasons why he feels it's necessary to have her there despite how you feel about it. This is something that can also be addressed during your counseling session (if you guys are undergoing pre-marital counseling). You should discuss it with him (while the two of you are alone) first. This day belongs to you and him, if either one of you feel uncomfortable or gets offended on your wedding day this will may a significant impact on your day. The two of you are in control and will have to support one another throughout your lives together. You guys will need to avoid any outside negative influences, even if only one of you perceives the influence as negative (in may ways you will become one).

If she somehow winds up coming, don't give her the power of affecting your day in any way. You are the queen, it is your wedding. Don't forget!

Good Luck

Toy

[swelch]

What's wrong with you people? Ex's are historical events. Not allowed.

[jonimcanulty]

I agree 100%. Remember it's your special day and you need to keep it like that.

[edamanskis]

Ask him how he would truly feel if you invited your ex-boyfriend to the wedding.
Give him time to really think that over and consider it.

Is he really good friends with this woman still?
If so...why?
What possible reason does he have for maintaining a relationship with her? (especially if you feel she interfere's with your relationship)

I hate to agree with the rude post from above...but I sorta do think that Ex's should be history.

[reecey]

Let's look at this logically...are you afraid that she won't "forever hold her peace"? If you're not worried about that, then, by all means, invite her! Let her see that he's yours and she's sittin there watching you and him on the happiest day of your lives. Maybe your fiance wants her to get that picture. Men have a different sort of logic than women. Sometimes people just need things thrown in their face to understand. Maybe since he knows her better than you do, he knows that this is true about her.


My fiance's ex girlfriend of 2 1/2 years has been trying to cause trouble within our relationship, but he still wants to invite her to our wedding. I can't understand why he wants her there because I'm not inviting any of my exes. I want to tell him that it's my wedding, and it's going to be how I want it, but I can't because it's his wedding too. It's our special day, and I want it to be as perfect as possible; and I defiantly DON'T want to feel uncomfortable. Should I tell him that its her or me? or should I just let him invite her to keep the peace?? I can't help but think that inviting her might bring closure to their relationship... kind of like a he's my husband, so keep your hands off type thing... but then again, she's crazy and she might do something to ruin it.. I really need some help with this!!!