Bridal Party Problem

[sunshined121]

I am not sure what to do about the bridal party. I would prefer to have no bridal party, but my fiance wants to have groomsman. I don't have any close friends. I have a sister, but we are not very close. She also did not include me in the bridal party of her wedding. I could choose her, but it would be a desparate act. My fiance has two male friends he'd like to have as groomsman. He also has a sister that he would like to include. His sister could be one of my maid of honor's or a female groomsman. I'm not close with his sister and she doesn't live in the area. I sort of would rather have no bridal party than to choose bridesmaids that I'm not close with. The fiance seems to want to go with the traditional party. Does anyone have any ideas what to do?

[MN_Hollie]

I would talk to you FH about how you feel. If he feels the same way, try making it a small wedding party. Are you close to any cousins or co- workers? I have seen people have their mothers as matron of honors.. if you are close to your mother... I am having my SIL in my wedding simply because she is my SIL. I can see why he wants his sister included.

Good luck,
Hollie

[reecey]

I am not sure what to do about the bridal party. I would prefer to have no bridal party, but my fiance wants to have groomsman. I don't have any close friends. I have a sister, but we are not very close. She also did not include me in the bridal party of her wedding. I could choose her, but it would be a desparate act. My fiance has two male friends he'd like to have as groomsman. He also has a sister that he would like to include. His sister could be one of my maid of honor's or a female groomsman. I'm not close with his sister and she doesn't live in the area. I sort of would rather have no bridal party than to choose bridesmaids that I'm not close with. The fiance seems to want to go with the traditional party. Does anyone have any ideas what to do?


I guess you could do this: You could think about who it is that you would turn to (other than future hubby!) if you had a problem - the person that would listen and give advice and help you in any way they could...If its your mom, pick her. If its the coworker that you always hang out with but didn't think of because its a coworker - pick her (OR HIM! Nothing says your attendants have to be female!) If you have a brother and you and he are inseparable, then there you go! You could even include his sister as a bridesmaid not just for continuity, but also to please him on his wedding day - you never know - this could really bring you closer to her as well! She might even turn out to be your new best friend :)

[Lilly]

I think that you should talk to him about how you feel. But also keep in mind that this is his wedding day, and perhaps sharing his special day with his two friends and his sister really means something to him. YOu don't want to take that away. It's ok if a bridal party is uneven, there is no rule against that.

mara@marasevents.com

[SOM Z28]

I am not sure what to do about the bridal party. I would prefer to have no bridal party, but my fiance wants to have groomsman. I don't have any close friends. I have a sister, but we are not very close. She also did not include me in the bridal party of her wedding. I could choose her, but it would be a desparate act. My fiance has two male friends he'd like to have as groomsman. He also has a sister that he would like to include. His sister could be one of my maid of honor's or a female groomsman. I'm not close with his sister and she doesn't live in the area. I sort of would rather have no bridal party than to choose bridesmaids that I'm not close with. The fiance seems to want to go with the traditional party. Does anyone have any ideas what to do?

Do you have any other siblings? I was sorta in the same boat as you...my fiance is a triplet, so he wanted both of his brothers to stand up for him, but I really didn't have any female friends I'd ask. So instead, I asked my brother and he is my only attendant.

Another idea is to ask your mom. It sounds a little odd, but I've heard of people doing it. So if you're close to your mom, that might be an option.

[sandstar]

My fiance told me his biggest fear about getting married was not having a best man and that bothering me. I told him I would not have a maid of honor if that would be easier for him. My friends understood and we were both happy. I wanted a bridal party though because I do not want 100% of the attention so we chose to have a lot of flower girls and jr ushers. Talk with him about your concern and how stressfull for you it will be to choose someone for this important role and how you do not think you would be comfortable with certain people as your MOH. Hopefully he will understand. Good luck

[chiefsgirl]

I am in a similiar situation...I only really have one close friend that i want in my wedding and he has like fifteen. To even things out a little bit, I am having the wife of his best man as one of my bridesmaids...when the whole wedding thing started I didn't know her very well, but she has been such a big help with everything (since she has already been through this and has been a bridesmaid a few times before) and since we have been spending a lot of time together doing wedding stuff, we have gotten to be pretty close friends. I am also having his sister stand with me for appearance (she lives far away and can't/won't come up any earlier than the day before the wedding)...so we will each have three standing with us...the other friends he wants to include are basically doing pre-wedding bridal party stuff and they will all get boutineers and be recognized in the programs.

[MommaBird]

My future SIL told me that at her wedding, the didn't have a wedding party, because he didn't have any friends! She had quite a few that she wanted to ask, but he had no one for his side. Not just no one he wanted to ask.... no one. Now I know why they're divorced! Now I'm not saying that you're like him. You've got people you CAN ask, you just don't want to. Seriously talk to your FH about that. Maybe he can have one of his friends do a reading, and another offer a service (play an instrument, rent the 'get away' car) in place of being groomsmen. Check with him, and see if he'd be willing to swap the wedding party for special attendants. If it's a no-go, definitly ask your mom! Think of how honored she'd feel!