An uneven wedding party... Help!

[c_cheff]

My fiance and I have decided on having a small ceremony, yet a large reception (took alot of convincing but I managed to get my big party). Thing is, our wedding party is uneven...

:confused: Problem?
**I have my cousin as my Matron of Honour. We grew up together and been through alot together.

**I have my best friend as Bridesmaid. I can't exclude her since she has been there for me through my toughest times, even through the birth of my youngest daughter.

**I have my oldest daughter (from a previous relationship who will be 10 when we get married) she's gonna be my jr. bridesmaid.

**And our youngest daughter (who will be 3) will be our flowergirl.


**His best man is his sister's husband

**His son (from a previous relationship who will be 8 but taller than the jr. bridesmaid) is going to be the jr. groomsman.

My fiance is determined to keep the wedding party small but I can't cut out any of these girls, they have too much significance in my life to leave them out!
In other words, this is how I see it...
Maid of Honour Best Man
Bridesmaid (no one)
Jr. Bridesmaid Jr. Groomsman
Flower girl (no one)

I'm confused as to how it's gonna work out walking down the aisle.
How can we fix it so it doesn't look awkward the day of our wedding?

[steve47807]

My fiance and I have decided on having a small ceremony, yet a large reception (took alot of convincing but I managed to get my big party). Thing is, our wedding party is uneven...

:confused: Problem?
**I have my cousin as my Matron of Honour. We grew up together and been through alot together.

**I have my best friend as Bridesmaid. I can't exclude her since she has been there for me through my toughest times, even through the birth of my youngest daughter.

**I have my oldest daughter (from a previous relationship who will be 10 when we get married) she's gonna be my jr. bridesmaid.

**And our youngest daughter (who will be 3) will be our flowergirl.


**His best man is his sister's husband

**His son (from a previous relationship who will be 8 but taller than the jr. bridesmaid) is going to be the jr. groomsman.

My fiance is determined to keep the wedding party small but I can't cut out any of these girls, they have too much significance in my life to leave them out!
In other words, this is how I see it...
Maid of Honour Best Man
Bridesmaid (no one)
Jr. Bridesmaid Jr. Groomsman
Flower girl (no one)

I'm confused as to how it's gonna work out walking down the aisle.
How can we fix it so it doesn't look awkward the day of our wedding?

We initially had the exact opposite problem with our plans (too many grooms attendants (including a woman)) and insufficient bridesmaids. We had to plan to substitute female members of my family as "stand-ins" for the bridal party. But now that my fiancee's parents are back on the positive side of this wedding idea (*snicker* LONG story), Jennifer will be having her 3 sisters as bridesmaids and her best friend as her maid of honor and I have to pull another groomsmen from somewhere (so far I've got my friend Adam in the role of best man (pending he doesn't get deployed), and my friends Kim and my dad as grooms attendants).

I would suggest using his dad or any of his brothers as groomsmen. Other than that, you could just deal with an uneven number of people. I've seen it done twice (I've been a groomsman or best man 6 times).

[SOM Z28]

My bridal party is uneven as well, and we are leaving it like that. There's no rule saying that the attendents have to have someone to escort them.

My FH's 2 brothers are standing up for him, and my brother is standing up for me. Most likely, they'll all be in position as the ceremony starts, and afterwards, after we walk up the aisle, I'll have the guys take turns...his best man, then my brother, then his other brother.

[reecey]

My fiance and I have decided on having a small ceremony, yet a large reception (took alot of convincing but I managed to get my big party). Thing is, our wedding party is uneven...

:confused: Problem?
**I have my cousin as my Matron of Honour. We grew up together and been through alot together.

**I have my best friend as Bridesmaid. I can't exclude her since she has been there for me through my toughest times, even through the birth of my youngest daughter.

**I have my oldest daughter (from a previous relationship who will be 10 when we get married) she's gonna be my jr. bridesmaid.

**And our youngest daughter (who will be 3) will be our flowergirl.


**His best man is his sister's husband

**His son (from a previous relationship who will be 8 but taller than the jr. bridesmaid) is going to be the jr. groomsman.

My fiance is determined to keep the wedding party small but I can't cut out any of these girls, they have too much significance in my life to leave them out!
In other words, this is how I see it...
Maid of Honour Best Man
Bridesmaid (no one)
Jr. Bridesmaid Jr. Groomsman
Flower girl (no one)

I'm confused as to how it's gonna work out walking down the aisle.
How can we fix it so it doesn't look awkward the day of our wedding?

You could have the men already standing up there with the groom and have all the ladies walk alone. Its done this way a lot of times. That would provide the continuity that you're looking for and maybe make your future hubby a little more comfortable standing in front of people since he'll have his 2 best guys there with him :)

[reecey]

We initially had the exact opposite problem with our plans (too many grooms attendants (including a woman)) and insufficient bridesmaids. We had to plan to substitute female members of my family as "stand-ins" for the bridal party. But now that my fiancee's parents are back on the positive side of this wedding idea (*snicker* LONG story), Jennifer will be having her 3 sisters as bridesmaids and her best friend as her maid of honor and I have to pull another groomsmen from somewhere (so far I've got my friend Adam in the role of best man (pending he doesn't get deployed), and my friends Kim and my dad as grooms attendants).

I would suggest using his dad or any of his brothers as groomsmen. Other than that, you could just deal with an uneven number of people. I've seen it done twice (I've been a groomsman or best man 6 times).


Woohoo! yay for getting them to turn around! Hopefully they don't pull a Linda Blair and have their heads spin around while spewing green goo at you! I have my fingers crossed for you two!

[steve47807]

Woohoo! yay for getting them to turn around! Hopefully they don't pull a Linda Blair and have their heads spin around while spewing green goo at you! I have my fingers crossed for you two!

Why do you think the first contract we signed was for the SWAT team snipers? They are the first vendor to get booked!

[reecey]

Why do you think the first contract we signed was for the SWAT team snipers? They are the first vendor to get booked!


haha ;) I didn't have to sign that one - my family is chock-full of cops. I'm all set :P

[steve47807]

haha ;) I didn't have to sign that one - my family is chock-full of cops. I'm all set :P

I got a great deal on my SWAT team members because my grandmother (who just retired from 25+ years of service to the city in various administrative roles) is very good friends with the Chief of Police. Basically I just have to feed them and they will do anything I ask *laughs* :p

[nle5]

I got a great deal on my SWAT team members because my grandmother (who just retired from 25+ years of service to the city in various administrative roles) is very good friends with the Chief of Police. Basically I just have to feed them and they will do anything I ask *laughs* :p

Where would I find a SWAT team? I'm thinking I might need one to make sure my ex does not show up at the wedding.

[steve47807]

Where would I find a SWAT team? I'm thinking I might need one to make sure my ex does not show up at the wedding.


Honestly, talk to the local police department. If you offer to feed off-duty cops they would probably be more than happy to act as "covert security". Just like any man, the way to a cop's heart is through his stomach.

[c_cheff]

You could have the men already standing up there with the groom and have all the ladies walk alone. Its done this way a lot of times. That would provide the continuity that you're looking for and maybe make your future hubby a little more comfortable standing in front of people since he'll have his 2 best guys there with him :)

Hey reecey, thanks alot for the up & up... I think I'll do it that way... Now the only question I have is when it's time to leave the church, in what order should the wedding party depart? Wouldn't it be a little different?

[reecey]

Hey reecey, thanks alot for the up & up... I think I'll do it that way... Now the only question I have is when it's time to leave the church, in what order should the wedding party depart? Wouldn't it be a little different?


You could have the best man and maid of honor walk out together and then have the others walk out with anyone that is their age, and anyone that doesn't have someone that age can walk out alone - this part of the ceremony is a lot less formal and fun so it wouldn't really need to be as structured.

[c_cheff]

You could have the best man and maid of honor walk out together and then have the others walk out with anyone that is their age, and anyone that doesn't have someone that age can walk out alone - this part of the ceremony is a lot less formal and fun so it wouldn't really need to be as structured.


I'm so glad I signed up to use this forum... My brain is like mush and whatever would seem like common sense doesn't seem to quite fit together in my head. Thanks reecey for the walk-out suggestion. I think that's what we're going to do. :)

[Muffie]

Honestly, talk to the local police department. If you offer to feed off-duty cops they would probably be more than happy to act as "covert security". Just like any man, the way to a cop's heart is through his stomach.


Hey, hey. Not all cops like coffee and donuts. In fact, I think that my FH flunked that class in the academy! Seriously, your hall may require a detail cop, in which case, you should talk to the local department and explain your situation to them. They can then be on the lookout for trouble makers.

[loveatfirstphp]

My fiance and I have decided on having a small ceremony, yet a large reception (took alot of convincing but I managed to get my big party). Thing is, our wedding party is uneven...

:confused: Problem?
**I have my cousin as my Matron of Honour. We grew up together and been through alot together.

**I have my best friend as Bridesmaid. I can't exclude her since she has been there for me through my toughest times, even through the birth of my youngest daughter.

**I have my oldest daughter (from a previous relationship who will be 10 when we get married) she's gonna be my jr. bridesmaid.

**And our youngest daughter (who will be 3) will be our flowergirl.


**His best man is his sister's husband

**His son (from a previous relationship who will be 8 but taller than the jr. bridesmaid) is going to be the jr. groomsman.

My fiance is determined to keep the wedding party small but I can't cut out any of these girls, they have too much significance in my life to leave them out!
In other words, this is how I see it...
Maid of Honour Best Man
Bridesmaid (no one)
Jr. Bridesmaid Jr. Groomsman
Flower girl (no one)

I'm confused as to how it's gonna work out walking down the aisle.
How can we fix it so it doesn't look awkward the day of our wedding?


Have the guys already be at the alter and have each girl walk up by herself. That is what we are doing for our because we also have an unever number of people in the bridal party.

[NYjerseygirl]

I have 2 BM, 1 MOH, 1 FG, and Chuck has only one GM.

[apetties]

My fiance and I have decided on having a small ceremony, yet a large reception (took alot of convincing but I managed to get my big party). Thing is, our wedding party is uneven...

:confused: Problem?
**I have my cousin as my Matron of Honour. We grew up together and been through alot together.

**I have my best friend as Bridesmaid. I can't exclude her since she has been there for me through my toughest times, even through the birth of my youngest daughter.

**I have my oldest daughter (from a previous relationship who will be 10 when we get married) she's gonna be my jr. bridesmaid.

**And our youngest daughter (who will be 3) will be our flowergirl.


**His best man is his sister's husband

**His son (from a previous relationship who will be 8 but taller than the jr. bridesmaid) is going to be the jr. groomsman.

My fiance is determined to keep the wedding party small but I can't cut out any of these girls, they have too much significance in my life to leave them out!
In other words, this is how I see it...
Maid of Honour Best Man
Bridesmaid (no one)
Jr. Bridesmaid Jr. Groomsman
Flower girl (no one)

I'm confused as to how it's gonna work out walking down the aisle.
How can we fix it so it doesn't look awkward the day of our wedding?

Mine will be uneven as well but I don't think anyone will notice because my FH's bestman will not be an escort he will stand beside the groom but since the BM's are having escorts my sister MH wanted to have an escort as well, my son who will be 15 escort her and not the best man. So, I think think it would not be noticed since all the BM & MH will have an escort and the BM will stand with my FH, so I think it's going to be fine.

[girlnpink01]

I know it may seem a little off, but nobody said a wedding had to be an equal amount of people on both sides. No doubt it looks better, but you shouldnt cut anyone out of your party. If he really doesnt want to make it any bigger, then just have it the way you do. The problem wont be the aisle walking down crisis, but the dancing at the reception. Just have your matron of honor dance with her husband, and your flower girl dance with your father or his father. It really wont look that odd. Good luck!

[tiffani]

my bridal party is uneven and i am not having a flower girl or ring barrer.

i have my MOH and 2 bridesmaids all really close friends that have been with me thru thick and thin and my FHhas his "best person"(female best man) and thats it. so the line up will be my two bridesmaids and then MOH and BP then me and my stepfather. gosh i wish my wedding wasn't 2 years away.