How to plan a destination wedding

[SOM Z28]

My FH and I are considering getting married in Hawaii or Vegas and inviting only our immediate family. What sort of things should I take into consideration regarding the financial standing of those we want to invite?

My younger brother is on a tight budget, although it's possible that my mom might help him with a ticket.

My dad and stepmom are also on a fixed income, and my stepmom has a bad back with severe pain and has problems sitting for long periods of time, so I'm sure flying from NC to CA or HI is out of the question anyways.

My dad and stepmom made it to my first wedding, and my brother did not. I really want them all to be there, but I don't have the money to buy them all tickets. Would it be rude to plan a destination wedding knowing that some of my family might not be able to make it? Or should we go for what we want and just invite them to the reception we would have when we return?

[MOH]

What about doing the destination wedding you want with the real ceremony, etc. since that seems to be important to you.

Then, in keeping with your idea of having a reception when you return you could have that and repeat your vows informally (have a friend play the roll of the minister, etc. rather than assuming that cost again). You could have pictures from the origninal ceremony playing in a Powerpoint slide show while everyone socialized, ate and danced at the reception.

An alternative is to invert that and have the real ceremony and reception and then do the "destination" wedding with you two in an informal way (again not to assume the cost twice).

The real question becomes, is it more important for the people to see you get married and share that or is it more important to have the wedding in the location?