bridesmaid nightmare!!!!

[Krista]

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:mad: I am angry and honestly don't know what to do. I have 4 bridesmaids. My maid of honor is my best friend from college. Another bridesmaid is my best friend that I grew up. Then I have 2 girls that I met through my fiance'. One is married the other is not. The one that is not married is now driving me insane!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am starting to think that what people have said about married people or people in comitted relationships cannot be friends with single people is right. I never thought that before until now.

The single girl and i have been friends since the day we met. She was really the first friend that I had out of Scott's group of friends. We have always been close and could be honest with each other.

But now we are fighting about something that has nothing to do with me except for other people that are involved. The single girl and my fiance work for the same company. They are both involved in the employee activity committe. They have a yearly shopping trip. Single girl is the president of the EAC however the only thing she is supposed to do is run the meetings and that is IT! Well my fiance' and the woman who introduced us are in charge of the shopping trip.

Long story short Single Girl is trying to completely take over the shopping trip. There are certain things they MUST schedule around that are non-negotionable and she CANNOT get that through her head. It puts me in a horrible position. Especially since she called Jennifer a liar. Jennifer is the woman who introduced Scott and I and we are VERY close. We are like sisters. Jill is going completely crazy. You cannot get a straight answer out of her anymore. I was so upset with her I have cried for 2 days. She contradicts herself every other sentence. She tells me she doesn't care when or where we go on the trip yet she turns around and tells them where and when to go.

She is not the same person that she was when we met. And to be honest with you all for me it all started when I asked her to be in my wedding. She seemed very excited and said she wanted to be in it. But on the other hand everyone around her is getting married and she has not been in a serious relationship for years. So I wonder if it all stems from that. That is why she takes over so much because she has too much time on her hands and has to have someone to boss around.

I seriously wonder if I need to get a new bridesmaid???? I love her to death but I can't have all this drama at my wedding. :(

[reecey]

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:mad: I am angry and honestly don't know what to do. I have 4 bridesmaids. My maid of honor is my best friend from college. Another bridesmaid is my best friend that I grew up. Then I have 2 girls that I met through my fiance'. One is married the other is not. The one that is not married is now driving me insane!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am starting to think that what people have said about married people or people in comitted relationships cannot be friends with single people is right. I never thought that before until now.

The single girl and i have been friends since the day we met. She was really the first friend that I had out of Scott's group of friends. We have always been close and could be honest with each other.

But now we are fighting about something that has nothing to do with me except for other people that are involved. The single girl and my fiance work for the same company. They are both involved in the employee activity committe. They have a yearly shopping trip. Single girl is the president of the EAC however the only thing she is supposed to do is run the meetings and that is IT! Well my fiance' and the woman who introduced us are in charge of the shopping trip.

Long story short Single Girl is trying to completely take over the shopping trip. There are certain things they MUST schedule around that are non-negotionable and she CANNOT get that through her head. It puts me in a horrible position. Especially since she called Jennifer a liar. Jennifer is the woman who introduced Scott and I and we are VERY close. We are like sisters. Jill is going completely crazy. You cannot get a straight answer out of her anymore. I was so upset with her I have cried for 2 days. She contradicts herself every other sentence. She tells me she doesn't care when or where we go on the trip yet she turns around and tells them where and when to go.

She is not the same person that she was when we met. And to be honest with you all for me it all started when I asked her to be in my wedding. She seemed very excited and said she wanted to be in it. But on the other hand everyone around her is getting married and she has not been in a serious relationship for years. So I wonder if it all stems from that. That is why she takes over so much because she has too much time on her hands and has to have someone to boss around.

I seriously wonder if I need to get a new bridesmaid???? I love her to death but I can't have all this drama at my wedding. :(

Well, I can tell you that it is possible for single people and people who are married or in committed relationships to be friends. I have many friends that are single, and when I was, I had many friends that were married - and still have them.
It sounds like single girl is very jealous. As for the thing at work with your fiance and their committee thing - I know its hard, but stay out of it. Be there for your fiance, but if she brings it to you, or says anything derogatory about him or your other friend, flat out tell her that she's out of line. Explain to her that her crap is causing you grief and that you really don't need it at this time. Make her be accountable for her actions. I know it sucks, but you can't deal with this drama on your wedding day.

[Krista]

Well as if my wedding party problems weren't big enough!!!! As you know I was already having problems with one of them. I finally decided to tell her that she was putting me and herself into a very difficult position. She backed off a little bit. I thought things were going to be fine.

One of her other friends was also going to be a bridesmaid. I had given them over 3 months to get their measurements in and order the dresses. Well last week they still had not done it and since they both work full time the weekends were all the really had. This past Sat. was the company Christmas party so I was really getting nervous about them getting it done in time. As you know they have to order all the dresses at the same time. So if they were late getting their stuff in that would mean that everyone would have rush charges which is completely unfair to the ones that got their stuff in on time and most of them don't have the money to play around with. I think I had every right to be upset.

I will admit I did say somethings that I regret but it was nothing too serious. I apologized for what I said too. However, with a week to get dresses ordered they both said they don't want to be in the wedding. I was thinking about asking Jill to bow out anyway the other girl totally shocks me because I was not mad at her at all. She has had a lot on her plate. She was so excited to be in the wedding. So her to bow out now . . . I think was a decision based on her friendship to jill.

So Jill gave me the suggestion of DEMOTING 2 of the groomsmen so it would be even. How TACKY would that have been to do that. So I jut found 2 new bridesmaids.

Funny thing is the 2 girls think that everything will be just fine and our realtionship will be the same as it always has been and still wants to help me plan the wedding!!!!!!!!!!! Would any of you still feel that way??????????????? I am sorry but I can't look at them the same anymore. They are being very petty and selfish.

So a little advice to you all. Choose bridesmaids that you for absolute SURE will stand by and be responsible!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[reecey]

Well as if my wedding party problems weren't big enough!!!! As you know I was already having problems with one of them. I finally decided to tell her that she was putting me and herself into a very difficult position. She backed off a little bit. I thought things were going to be fine.

One of her other friends was also going to be a bridesmaid. I had given them over 3 months to get their measurements in and order the dresses. Well last week they still had not done it and since they both work full time the weekends were all the really had. This past Sat. was the company Christmas party so I was really getting nervous about them getting it done in time. As you know they have to order all the dresses at the same time. So if they were late getting their stuff in that would mean that everyone would have rush charges which is completely unfair to the ones that got their stuff in on time and most of them don't have the money to play around with. I think I had every right to be upset.

I will admit I did say somethings that I regret but it was nothing too serious. I apologized for what I said too. However, with a week to get dresses ordered they both said they don't want to be in the wedding. I was thinking about asking Jill to bow out anyway the other girl totally shocks me because I was not mad at her at all. She has had a lot on her plate. She was so excited to be in the wedding. So her to bow out now . . . I think was a decision based on her friendship to jill.

So Jill gave me the suggestion of DEMOTING 2 of the groomsmen so it would be even. How TACKY would that have been to do that. So I jut found 2 new bridesmaids.

Funny thing is the 2 girls think that everything will be just fine and our realtionship will be the same as it always has been and still wants to help me plan the wedding!!!!!!!!!!! Would any of you still feel that way??????????????? I am sorry but I can't look at them the same anymore. They are being very petty and selfish.

So a little advice to you all. Choose bridesmaids that you for absolute SURE will stand by and be responsible!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I guess it would really depend on HOW they backed out - did they throw a fit and say that they weren't going to be in the wedding or were they gracious and apologize and say that there was no way they were doing you justice because of their tight time constraints? I guess I could still be friends with them either way - but you're right - it wouldn't be the same if they were irresponsible - its a trust factor, ya know? And they proved that they couldn't be relied upon.

[Krista]

I guess it would really depend on HOW they backed out - did they throw a fit and say that they weren't going to be in the wedding or were they gracious and apologize and say that there was no way they were doing you justice because of their tight time constraints? I guess I could still be friends with them either way - but you're right - it wouldn't be the same if they were irresponsible - its a trust factor, ya know? And they proved that they couldn't be relied upon.
they pretty much threw a fit. Neither one of them apologized!!!!! They left me in a very tough predi***ent!!!! And to suggest to demote 2 of my fiance's groomsmen? That really bothered me too.

I think I can be friends with the other girl but Jill continues to amaze me with the way she acts towards my fiance' who is supposed to be one of her friends. She continues to undermine him with work related stuff and she is just unbelievable!!!

[reecey]

they pretty much threw a fit. Neither one of them apologized!!!!! They left me in a very tough predi***ent!!!! And to suggest to demote 2 of my fiance's groomsmen? That really bothered me too.

I think I can be friends with the other girl but Jill continues to amaze me with the way she acts towards my fiance' who is supposed to be one of her friends. She continues to undermine him with work related stuff and she is just unbelievable!!!


Then be relieved to be rid of them now! Better for them to make a scene now than DURING the wedding! I'm sure you've got people that would be more than happy to take their place! :)