hard to pick and thier not making it easier

[sassycassy0215]

my wedding is set for july 3, 2005 and i am very excited but some problems have been making the start of my planning very unpleasent! the first being that i am slowly starting to tell or should i say ask the ladies to be in my wedding party, i have had all good results with that part but the problem i have is who to pick for my maid of honor. now i wanted to go with the simple pick family so i dont hurt feelings but that isnt working, my roomate feels she should be my maid of honor because she is going to be around the most, a very good friend who is helping me do a lot of my planning think she should be the maid of honor because she is doing most of the running around with me.
i know that this should be a happy time but as the days go by i become more and more stressed over hurting those close to me by the choices i make. we want to have a small wedding because my husband to be is a marine and will be shipped out in nov. 2004 for 6 months and we want to stay on budget so our wedding has a total guest list of 100-150 poeple, how do i invite the one i am close to without hurting those that i still care about but dont think it is vital that they be there?
sorry i have so many questions, ha!
and lastly i have found the bridesmaid dresses that i love but my roomate who will be in my wedding party is making this so hard because she keeps thinking about herself and not what i like, now she is a bigger girl which doesnt matter but she looks at every dress as if she is the only one wearing it. this is a summer wedding and i want things to be bright, but she is going out of her way to do what makes her look best, she has even go so far as to say we should have a black and white wedding, come on now it is the summer, she saying black is me slimming, ugh

help me please i need all the advise i can get!!!!

[RadioLyss]

Well, congrats on your engagement first of all!

If you have chosen a family member like a sister, or a cousin you grew up with and are close to then that should be no problem in asking them to be your MOH. your friends should understand this. If this is not the case, then think about the reason you are picking a family member... is it just so a friend won't feel hurt? maybe one of your friends who you have known a long long time would be a better choice.

colors -- as long as the color will in fact look ok with all the people in your weddings complexion then it should be fine! Remember it is your wedding and in the end your decision!! If you haven't started the try-on process take a couple of the girls with you and have them try on various colors/styles. You could always pick a color, and then pick 2 styles so that those that don't mind showing off can, and those that may feel uncomfortable in one style could have a style that they feel good in! Your friend may be surprised by how she acctaully looks in the color/style you pick once she trys it on!

Inviting people... that is a hard one. I am having a similar issue since I have a HUGE family (with kids close to 100 people). My fiance and I have decided that we are only going to have 6 cousins of mine that we are both close to and 2 cousins of his we are both close to at the wedding... we are including them as flower girls/ring bearer/ushers and hostesses or junior bridesmaides. Anyway, an easy way is to say no kids... or no kids below __ age. Also, if you and your to be are paying, you don't need to include your parents work friends. Make a couple lists - those who HAVE to be invited, those who should be, and those who it would be nice to invite.

Hope this long answer helps!