Help! Two Ceremonies??

[sevn]

Hi Brides-To-Be,

I'm in a bind with both sides of the family. My family and my fiance's family live about 13hrs apart. My fiance and I are right in the middle. My parent's can't travel b/c they have an old, sick dog who needs special care. My fiance's grandparents are experiencing health problems, with his grandmother being bed-ridden recently for over a month with back pain. We want both of our families to see us get married (no eloping), but we aren't sure how to make this work out, perhaps two ceremonies. On top of this, we are paying for whatever type of wedding we would like and we have the smallest budget ever. Any ideas??

Thanks, sevn :confused:

[reecey]

Your parents won't travel because of an old, sick dog? There are plenty of dog boarding places that will take care of a dog - even one with health problems. This is your wedding. They should be willing to travel -dog or no dog. Its understandable that your fiance's family can't travel due to their own personal health problems. You shouldn't have to have 2 ceremonies. I would talk to your parents again - see if they can board the dog, or get a neighbor to watch over it.

Hi Brides-To-Be,

I'm in a bind with both sides of the family. My family and my fiance's family live about 13hrs apart. My fiance and I are right in the middle. My parent's can't travel b/c they have an old, sick dog who needs special care. My fiance's grandparents are experiencing health problems, with his grandmother being bed-ridden recently for over a month with back pain. We want both of our families to see us get married (no eloping), but we aren't sure how to make this work out, perhaps two ceremonies. On top of this, we are paying for whatever type of wedding we would like and we have the smallest budget ever. Any ideas??

Thanks, sevn :confused:

[sevn]

[QUOTE=sevn]Gee, thanks :rolleyes: I didn't ask you to judge my parents, just for some advice.[/QUOTE You shouldn't judge people without knowing all the facts.

[TeenBride]

Hey Sevn,
I know exactly what your going through. My fiance and I live in a completely different state then anyone in our family and are getting married here. A lot of our family has to travel to the wedding, but a lot of his family cannot. We are simply having the wedding and reception here, and then going to where his family is to have another reception where a film will be shown of our wedding. We simply cannot afford to have two ceremonies, and they are willing to pay for the second reception. It's an idea. Hope it works out.

[klhoracek]

I kinda agree with reecey. (sorry if I spelled that wrong) It is your big day! I'm trying to be considerate of people in planning mine, but not plan around them. There are some hotels/motels that will let people bring pets. Could your parents do that? Then they could have the dog close by to care for it. I wish you the best of luck figuring this out! :)

[erika_le11]

Your problem is very common with Asian weddings where a ceremony MUST be held at BOTH places if the families live too far apart to meet. I am assuming you are NOT Asian, but I want you to be rest assured that it IS possible to have two ceremonies. Since each ceremony will not have both families together, it will actually be cheaper for you because you will have two small parties instead of one BIG one.
If possible, try to rely on your bridal party to help you out. If that is not possible, many of my family members had different bridal party members at each location. That way, the bridal party members living in that location can do all the leg work for you as long as you feel confident that they will consult you first before making decisions. They will also know the cheapest places in town to go to.
Try to keep both weddings small (strictly family members and only a few clsoe friends). This will cut down alot on costs. Don't worry about offending those whom cannot be invited! This is YOUR wedding and if they are friends, they will understand if you simply tell them you cannot afford it. After your first "ceremony", you might receive some money as wedding gifts. This can be used to finance the cost of your second "ceremony".

TeenBride also had a great idea. Hope it works out!

[nle5]

Two weddings?? For someone that is trying to have a wedding on a small budget I do not see how you can afford two weddings. I would think that your mom and dad would be a little more flexible with their travel arrangements. I think the best way to handle this is to talk to your parents again and tell them how important it is to have them at your wedding. Tell your dad how important it is to you for him to walk you down the aisle. I would think that you would want your dad to walk you down the aisle at the wedding. If you do plan on two weddings then who will walk you down the aisle for the wedding in which your parents will not be attending? Surely, your parents can either board the dog or rent a motel that will allow the dog to be in the room. Your fiances relatives can not travel with their health problems and so you should be more flexible with them than with your parents.

I also think that maybe having one wedding and then doing two receptions might help out. But, are you ready for the fight of which family will get to see the wedding and which one will see the video? I noticed you didn't mention when you are planning on getting married. Maybe by the time the wedding takes place either the dog or his relatives will be in better health. I think that you have a lot to consider before setting up two weddings.

Just remember this is your day and the two of you should be happy.

[Kelly1Mickey]

I know at first it might sould silly that a dog would interfere with your wedding plans, but I could see my family having that problem. Pets are like family. My future mother-in-law boards her "kids" (dogs) at her vet's office. That might be an idea for your parents. I also agree with finding a pet-friendly hotel. That would probably make your parents more relaxed knowing their dog is close by. My FH and I have cut trips short because we missed our "kids" so much...I would be very worried if I was away from home when they were sick.
As far as 2 ceremonies...I live in Florida, ALL of my family (except my parents) are in New York, ALL of my FH's family is in Indiana, my matron-of-honor is in Michaigan, and a bridesmaid is in Tennessee. But my wedding is right here in my town in Florida. There are people with health concerns...one is wheelchair bound...but if they can't make it here, they just don't make it here. Knowing that some people would need extra time to make travel arrangements, we started planning way in advance. There is so much pressure in planning a wedding as it is, I couldn't see adding the stress of 2 weddings plus the traveling.