sister or best friend

[winterwinderland]

I recently got engaged and am already stumped. I have always imagined that I would have my best friend as my maid of honor, but I was my sisters maid of honor. I am not close with my sister at all , but I do love her. I know that she will be devestated if I don't ask her to be the M.O.F. She may even just asume that she is. My best friend is so much closer to me than my sister and she understands the situation and supports my decision. I know it's my choice, but is it really worth hurting people's feelings over? I need some advice. Thanks.

[Sarah]

You could have two. Many people do nowadays. If one is married, have a maid and a matron. Good luck!

[daemon82]

I had almost the exact same problem. Luckily, my friend made it easy by introducing me to my groom. I still debated over it, but quickly ***e to realize that, hurt feelings or no, the friend was the one I envisioned (and have been) planning my wedding with. She was the one I wanted to call immediately after we got engaged. She was the one I wanted to share those planning moments with.

A year down the road, will you be dissappointed in your choice?

If you really want the friend, but really don't want to hurt the sister, you could have a maid and a matron (or two maids of honor... that's what my sister did). That wasn't exactly an option for me, though, due to the small bridal party I was planning.

[HeatherLee]

Sarah's advice is good. Have them both be your MOH. Since your sister is married, she can be the Matron of Honor and the other can be the Maid of Honor. But if you do not want your sister as an MOH, then its okay to not ask her and to ask her to be a BM instead.. it may upset her a little but I'm sure she'll eventually understand. Just b/c you were her MOH, doesn't mean she has to be yours.

[iviissbrandi]

I'm having both, I could never choose! Put them on each an arm of the bestman! **Vavavoom** <~~ I'm all for different, no one has to follow the rules anymore, and that's what makes it fun!